You never have enough to feel rich

Early in my career, in the mid-1980's, I hit a new high in my annual income. It was $30,000. I was ecstatic. I felt rich. I looked at my checking account and suddenly the balance looked huge. I thought, "if only I could make $100,000, I'd feel really rich."

A few years went by. My career started to take off. My annual income hit $200,000. I was amazed. I felt rich. I paid off my home mortgage and took a trip to the Caribbean. I thought, "if I can just manage to put a million in the bank, I'll be really rich."

Another few years went by. My investment account hit a million. My house was finally paid off. I'd reached my financial goal. But I didn't really feel rich yet. I still felt financially insecure. Assuming an annual return of 5%, a million dollars will bring in $50,000. It didn't sound like enough yet to fund a retirement. But an annual return of $150,000 sounded about right. I needed three million dollars to feel really, really secure.

A few more years went by. My investment account now has five million dollars. I've reached my goal -- and more. But in the meantime, my spending has gone up. I've bought a larger house. I've bought other real estate. All of it is paid-for, and I still have no debts, but I'm taking more foreign trips. My family acquires stuff. I'm too busy to clean the house so now we have a weekly house-cleaner. I'm fixing up the garden. I worry about inflation. I worry about the economy. I watch the stock market go up and down, up and down. I don't feel rich yet. I think, if I have ten million dollars in my investment account, maybe then I'll feel completely secure.

And so it goes.

I've read studies that say no one ever really feels rich. They always think, "if I have three times what I have now, then I'll feel rich." And that certainly is what's happened to me.

It may also have to do with the fact that I started off middle class, and worried about the future. I grew up in a household where pennies were tight, where my dad always thought we were on the verge of losing everything, and we never felt secure. I think you carry that mind-set into your adult years. I'll always be saving, always be worried that I could lose it all in an instant.

So I keep working, keep feeling like I'm engaged in "a struggle." Even though, logically speaking, I know this is bullshit. I'm as secure as one could ever be.

I just need, oh, about fifteen million dollars to feel really secure.